A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

Why cant Helen Keller driver? She's a woman

Why is Texas so hot? The sun

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

Knock-knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? I just said it was Steve

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

A man walked into a bar owch

what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Yo mama so fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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