Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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What is worse than 3 lesbians in a telephone booth? 6 squirrels donkey punching your urethra.

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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