What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

what happened to the asian who failed his math quiz... his parents killed him

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

A woman walks into a bar.

A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

Yo mama's so fat that after her enima, she looked skinny and rather nice

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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