roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

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how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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I have sexdaily. Sorry I mean dyslexia.

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops