Knock Knock The doors already open

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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