What's Green and invisible? This cabbage --------------------------->>>>>

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two muffins are in an oven. Ten minutes later we're enjoying delicious muffins together.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 all have in common? None of them will get you laid.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a black guy and a bucket of chicken? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Cacti are green Clouds are white Spoons are silver Corn is yellow Carrots are orange Asphalt is black Grapes are purple Cinnamon is brown Lets's have sex

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the last thing to go through a flys head when it hits your windshield? Its ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many people were trampled on Black Friday this year? Not enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did'n the baby wake up from his nap? because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops