Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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