Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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What did the biological child say to his adopted sister? We are both loved equally by our parents.

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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Hi I am Michael Jackson... you have any young boys? My park is open :), the "nude dark caverns" can be scary, but I accompany them all, so relax. Moral: LEAVE MJ ALONE! ;(

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What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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