Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

What is worst than your girlfriend's mother?? Osama Bin Laden's One

Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

Two muffins are cooling on a windowsill. One muffin says to the other "It sure is a beautiful day today." The other muffin says "Holy shit! A talking muffin!"

Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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