Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Whats a frogs favorite year? 2009!

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What did the blonde say when she saw anti-joke.com for the first time? Nothing. She's been in a vegetative state for three years and her parents finally decided to pull the plug.

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What's funny about four black guys driving off a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends...

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Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Vaginal secretions

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Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops