Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

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Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

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Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

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Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops