What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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Why? Why not?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

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how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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why is cancer a big thing because its bad

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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