your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

Why did the man die? A fridge fell on him.

What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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