I think everybody should have a penis.

You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

I run, but I have no legs. I see, but I have no eyes. What am I? A prospective result of future medical advancements that allow the disabled to live normal, healthy and fulfilling lives.

Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... ME

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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