Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

penis

Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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