Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

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What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Dwight Howard

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Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

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A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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