Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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What african eat for christmas Sand.

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stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

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-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

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Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

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No because your face is really f***** up.

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Women's rights.

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

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What's the difference between chili and a urologist? One is hot and spicy and the other analyzes urine.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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