Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

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Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

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How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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LO AND BEHOLD!

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

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I've been hearing a lot of Jew jokes lately, Anne Frankly I'm sick off it.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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Why did the cat lick the black guy. Because the cat thought it was dirty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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