What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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which one is easiest

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What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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