How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A guy walked into a store and bought a candy bar. Why? Because he wanted some chocolate.

What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

What do u call a cripple Biv

why doesn't anyone like reed? who cares, no one likes reed

When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

Women's rights

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

A comedian walks onto the stage. Antehumor.

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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