Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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