Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

What did Osama bin Laden say when he heard loud gunshots outside his millitary compound? A: We'll never find out

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

Robin, get in the batmobile

yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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