How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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No soup for you!

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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