Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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