Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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How did the girl get rid of a fever? She took medicine.

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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What did the boy say to the girl seductively eating a banana? A: bananas are my favorite fruit

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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Black people being friendly.

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Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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