How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

wanna hear a joke? yes

A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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