Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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Why are black men's genitals larger than white men's genitals. Black men's genitals are made up of more skin cells.

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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there were 2 black men and a mexican man in a car. who as driving? we cant tell from the problem but is is more likely it is a black guy because there are 2 of him and 1 mexican.

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops