What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding two worms. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Dying from cancer.

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what did the black kid get for christmas? I dont know....whatever he wrote on his wishlist.

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Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

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Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Ehh

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What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

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knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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Knock Knock ? Whose's there ? The person you should be opening the door for The person you should be opening the door for who? Oh my god Frank open the goddamn door

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A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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