Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

Knock knock Whose there? 4

What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

roses are red violets should be purple

did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

What is long hard and woody? A tree.

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

seek beauty

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

Boy: Your father must be an alien, because there’s nothing else like you on earth! Girl: *whispering* please don't tell anyone we are trying not to be noticed...

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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