Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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knock knock... ...no answer

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Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops