If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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Why was the Chinese man so sad? He's Asian.

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? It would probably be the court janitor who was responsible for that job, rather than the lawyers.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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Q - How do you call black people driving in a black car on the black road, then falling off the black cliff into the black water? A - An unfortunate accident.

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? That feels quite good.

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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Kevin and Ramin

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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