-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

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Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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Roses are red violets are blue, I have no pickup line, just Get your tits out

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why was the frog sad..... because it was stappled to the boys face

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Q:Whats worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A: 8 dead babies in a barrel. Q: Whats worse than that? A: A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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whats black and large -me

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How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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kk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops