Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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