mark is religion

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jeffrey: Do you know what happened on the 5th of november? gerald: No jeffrey: I cant remember

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A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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Knock knock *open*

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Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

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what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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