You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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Yo mamma so black that u can't see her eyebrows

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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Albert your flies undone.

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

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justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

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how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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She was so hot every guy instantly jizzed upon seeing her. Even seeing her fingernails gave boners to thousands of people. Poor thing never had sex, no one could hold it in until they started. Maybe only Chuck Norris.

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Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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Q: Whats funny about the Holocaust A: Nothing

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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