roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A stripper walks into a bar, she proceeds to cry because she's an alcoholic and a stripper. Meanwhile, her 3 children sit at home hungry. She then goes home, and grabs her gun and shoots her children, then shoots herself. Bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

thumb_up thumb_down +2

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are all black people fast? because all the slow ones are in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So a duck walks into a pharmacy and says "i need some ointment for my beak, its rather chapped." and the Pharmacist said "Sorry we don't have anything for ducks here."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

autsim

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +2

LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops