yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops