Knock knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave Smith.

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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dont you love porch monkeys? no.

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What did the korean guy order at the deli? A sandwich

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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What african eat for christmas Sand.

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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