A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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