What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...