what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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whats the capital of congo famine

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Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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Try typing in any three letters in Google images and you will always see something inappropriate. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops