Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

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I'm homeless.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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Tough crowd tonight...

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When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

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Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

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roses are blue, violets are unicorns, this poem doesnt make any sense. refrigerator

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops