Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

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Knock Knock! Who's there? It's Jim. Jim who? I'm your son, Jim. Are you losing your memory?

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Whats an Anit-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops