How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

Knock Knock Who's There 42

A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the car? Get in the car.

what do you call a professional gamer Their name

Your life

What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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