What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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i 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ME

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BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

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A bus crashes and everybody dies.

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Penis

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Cancer. Super Cancer.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Why didn't Suzie Fall off the Swings? She Has no legs and couldn't get on

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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