What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

hi mom

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

ecks! why zee?

What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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