Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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A person from Singapore eats

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What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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A blind man walks into a library.

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

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stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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