Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

How come grilled cheese?

What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

A small boy is playing on the sidewalk. Then, he is approached by a black van. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away. Then, the man driving the van says, "So, how was your day, son?"

have you ever had african food? neither have they

The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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