Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

Obama walks into a hospital....

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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