What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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Tommy got neutered.

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

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want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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