What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

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What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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What time do you go to the dentist? Depends on the appointment.

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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haha Otarts was here

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

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nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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