"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

periods are red waffles are blue your mum's a milf I sucked her boob

I know you are but what am I? Gay.

Women's rights

How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

name 3 fruit begining with n a napple, a norange, and a nannana

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

What do you call a woman in a kitchen ? There rightful place.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Why can't antelopes fly? Because they can't

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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